Thursday, February 24, 2011

K-LOVE - Jason Castro "You Are" LIVE

Another song today that I heard on the radio that hits very close to home. I did not know that American Idol produced so many amazing Christian singers.

Is done just dating God and ready for a full time commitment....

No, I'm not crazy, this is my answer to the question posed to me in my daily devotional podcast from Joyce Meyer.  I must say I'm a bit nervous, but I have already put it all at God's feet and I am ready to completely put my faith and trust in him AND give completely to what he asks of me and not just half of what he asks. 

Since starting my beginning my spiritual journey in M.O.M.S, I have seen things so differently.  Going to church on Sundays and praying from home (or wherever else the urge/need to pray hits me) is just the tip of the iceberg and only a part of what he asks of me.  I am not sure why it is all happening now, but he knows.  I know that right now I have so many struggles in my life and I know that only if I commit to him completely and fully will I rise from my struggles and be where I am and who I am supposed to be in my life.  Even writing this leaves me a bit dazed and confused, so I will just continue to listen for his lead and follow, at some point it will become a big beautiful picture.

My husband and I have so many struggles right now.  Getting a house ready to sell in a market that is not by any means seller friendly, attempting to get the finances in order (you know paying off the debt and trying to be better savers), oh and did I mention the getting ready for him to leave for a 14 month det. to struggles or stresses there at all.  It is in the midst of this and raising a family that I am beginning to blossom in my spirituality.  In this I understand that I am only human and I will have my personal struggles and my occasional falls from good graces (i.e. the thing called retail therapy), but it is in recognizing this, continuing to pray for God's guidance, continuing to listen to him AND following him and trusting in him 100% that in his time things will happen.   It is a kind of weird surreal feeling, as stressed as I should feel right now about everything, I no longer am stressed, in fact I feel at peace (feels weird saying that) with everything.  I know and have always believed (maybe not always understood it) that he will never give me more than I can handle, so it he has put this in front of me, then he knows I will make it through. 

 I think I'm beginning to babble again...but seriously I know what I'm talking about.
  God Bless!

Stronger by Mandisa (From the Upcoming Album "What If We Were Real")

This song came on the radio this morning and it really hit home for me... This will get me through the next year and a half... 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

So, I have not posted again in about a week or so...someday I will find the time to share life's events on a more regular basis.  I've been going to M.O.M.S (Ministry of Mom's Sharing) for a few weeks now and I LOVE it, I can see changes in myself already (and the women I have met are wonderful).  Now of course there is always room for's a marathon not a sprint, LMBO!  I've set another mini goal for myself, but it is really something I've been setting out to do since the deigning of the know the one about my owning my feelings and not letting other's walk all over me...again it's a work in progress.  I am determined to not let the actions of others destroy me while  J is gone this time around.  I still have to learn to share my feelings with people and let them know when they have hurt my feelings, the trick is to do it without crying.

In my journey through M.O.M.S I have learned to start recognizing the "grace filled" moments in my life, you know it truly is the little things in life that make it all worth being a mom.  For example last Friday mine was grace filled moment was wonderful and made me realize how blessed I am with such wonderful children.  My children had gotten out of school early and were just bickering with each other all day, driving me out of my mind.  I left to do grocery shopping and had left them to do their chores (and try not to kill each other), when I returned home all four of them came to the car and helped me take in the groceries and put them away and this all without me having to ask them.  The groceries were in the house and all put away within 20 minutes, I was amazed!  I of course thanked them, however, later that evening I was riding to the airport to pick up my dad and enjoying some Kari Jobe music, reflecting on my day and realized how amazing my children were. 

On another note, as I have said I am not doing the 26.2 with Donna, because of my lack of ability to train properly for it but I am doing the Disney Princess 1/2 which is in like 19 days.  I am so excited to do the race again with Christine and enjoy a weekend away.  I am hoping that now that I've started running again and I can continue on my path to getting myself healthy again and lose the weight I've gained in the past year.  Time will of course tell. 

So, all in all even with the minor bumps and bruises along the way this past week, life has been amazingly wonderful and I am feeling truly blessed!

 Angel 2